7 Things to Do When You’re Lost or Lonely
It was a little over six months ago that I moved back home. I transferred schools thinking that everything would be soooo much better and I’d be happier when I got back. Except that’s not what happened. After my Freshman year of college I decided that the major I was in wasn’t for me. The problem was I didn’t know what was for me. I was lost.
Moving home only came with feelings of unclarity, loneliness, and uncertainty. Despite being surrounded by the people I love and being completely ecstatic about it, I felt lost. I was still trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life (still trying!) and felt like I was a complete failure.
Everywhere I looked I saw people who seemed like they had it all figured out. In the entertainment industry, I see actors and musicians my age who are very successful. In my community, I saw people I went to high school with having “the college experience” I always thought I would have. I saw success and belonging on my social media feeds which only made things harder for me. It seemed like everywhere I looked was a reminder that I no longer belonged in a place I call home. I felt like no one understood what I was going through and I would never get out of the funk I was in. Honestly, sometimes I still feel like I’m lost in it.
If you have ever felt any of these emotions, then this post is totally for you! Below is a list of things you can do to move through your funk.
This might sound lame but it really helped me. I took all different kinds of quizzes in hopes that I would find some answers. It started with personality tests. These quizzes give you a better understanding of where you are in life and why you might be feeling lost. They also give you a better idea of career options that might be a good fit for you. If not, take career quizzes. I found a lot of these to be slightly off but there are some good ones like The Princeton Review. On a completely different note, you can take fun quizzes that tell you what kind of animal you would be. Even if you don’t find the answers you’re looking for, they can be fun!
Reading can help pass time. I read books, blogs, news articles, honestly anything I could get my hands on. I went through a phase where I wanted to drop everything and travel the world so I would spend HOURS reading endless amounts of travel blogs, getting lost in the information. Before I knew it I had been reading for 4 hours. The best part about reading is the knowledge you gain. This option isn’t as mindless as finding out what kind of animal you would be but it definitely passes time.
TIP: if you don’t know what you are interested in, pick something you know nothing about. Who knows, it could be what you’re looking for to get you out of your funk!
Another thing you can do is write. I have always loved to write so this was very therapeutic to me. Although writing in a journal is a good choice, I like to write stories. So I would use my feelings and put them into mini stories that expressed exactly how I was feeling. If you choose the journal route, you can write all your thoughts and feelings and date them. It is also a good way to look back in time and see how much you have progressed later when you don’t feel lost anymore!
Go For a Walk or Get Lost Exploring
One thing I did a lot when I came home was went for hikes. I would hike mostly in the foothills around my house but going for a walk in the street is just as good. I found that being in nature helped clear my mind and provided me with something else to focus on (like the burning of my lungs and limbs on hard hikes that proved to me I need to exercise more and sit on the couch less). Not only is this option good for you physically but seeing everything around you puts things into perspective!
This one has been the hardest for me. Everything I read told me to go out with friends for a fun night. The only problem was all my friends were 2,000 miles away at my old school so I couldn’t just call them up to hang out. LUCKILY my awesome boyfriend moved home with me! Whenever I was feeling extra down, making plans gave me something to look forward to. It could be something as small as going out to dinner or the movies, anything that you don’t do on a daily basis.
TIP: Try making plans with yourself! Treat yourself to your favorite meal, a movie, or even a shopping spree at your favorite store (Target anyone??)
Try Something New
I admit this is something I didn’t do often because the thought of something unknown gives me anxiety, buuuuuuuut doing new things like yoga or rock climbing can really help you. By focusing on the mechanics of the activity you are doing, you have less time to think about how you have been feeling. I found comfort in cooking for my family (am I actually an older woman stuck in a 20 year old’s body idk??) so I was constantly trying out new recipes that I thought we would like. I also taught myself how to knit and I made a decent-ish blanket for my grandma (again with the old lady). Getting lost in new activities is a great way to pass time!
I found this one to be very helpful! There is something about a clean living space that makes me feel better and think clearer. I can’t tell you how much time I spent (and spend) cleaning my room. I would go through my dresser and get rid of things I didn’t wear, move things around, sweep, and clean every inch of my room. Plus you just might find some things you thought you lost in the past! Just think: Clean Space= Clear Mind!
If All Else Fails…
Talk to someone. One of the most important things anyone can do is communicate how you are feeling. Never feel like you need to keep how you are feeling to yourself. Whether it be a family member or close friend, a professional, or even me, talk to someone! Don’t do this with the intention of getting all the answers, because odds are you won’t. Communicating how you feel to someone you trust lets them know you are struggling and will hopefully release any tension you have holding in.
Most importantly, be self-aware. If you feel like you won’t get out of this funk or the weight of the world is becoming too much to handle, seek professional help. Iv’e learned that many people go through this, and we aren’t alone. I may not be a professional, but it is always an option to contact me if you need someone to talk to! Even if it’s not on this list, find things you enjoy and become happy again. Spend your time doing things you love with the people you love. Eventually, the answers will come and the funk will be gone.
Have you ever felt lost or lonely? Leave a comment on tips that helped you through it!